just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize