i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Randomize
