The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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