She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
