Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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