my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
