I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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