I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
