Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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