How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
