I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
