hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
send nudes
from the living room?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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