Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
