She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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