If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
