So drunk its hurt
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
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