so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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