is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
