just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
