If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
