just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize