my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
