I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
