if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize