Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
