sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
