She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
he quoted the bible to break up with me
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
