Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize