You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
