Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
where does the pee come out of this thing
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
