Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
