Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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