I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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