she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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