Where is the hickey?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
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