Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
