She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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