If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
