So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
