so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
