Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
