Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
