It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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