i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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