boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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