Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
