Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
