all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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