I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
