Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
