HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
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